We Are Family

My parents divorced when I was 4. Growing up we had a fairly typical arrangement. I lived with my mom and stayed with my dad every other weekend. Holidays were split. Dad got us Christmas Eve. Mom got us Christmas Day. It was this way until I moved up to Washington in 7^th grade. I lived in Washington until the end of my freshman year. During those years I came down to visit two or three times a year.

Sophomore year my mom and I moved back down to Sacramento, CA. While we were living in Washington my mom rented out our Sacramento house. We were able to return to the same house, but life was different.

I no longer went over to my dad’s house every other weekend. We no longer split holidays, we shared them. I don’t know what changed. My dad started coming over for holiday. He was there Thanksgiving, Christmas, Forth of July, Birthday, even Memorial Day and Labor Day BBQ’s. It has been such a blessing that even though my family is divorced, I don’t feel my family is split.

This past weekend was proof of that.

Four years ago my dad moved up to Portland, OR to be with his girlfriend. This past weekend my mom, brother, sister, brother in law, niece, Bob and I all traveled up to Portland for a weekend of calibration. Laura, my dad’s girlfriend, graduated college. Sunday was my birthday and fathers day. Sunday as a family we sat down to a home cooked meal my dad expressed his gratitude for us all being able to come up and spend the weekend together. It is the first time that I remember my father tearing up. At that moment I felt so lucky that my family was all together and there was so much love in the room.

Excuses

I’m having a hard time posting because:

-I’m getting ready to go on vacation

-I just started summer school

-I STILL don’t have internet at home

Regular consistent posting will continue next week.

Bloody Mary In the Morning

I woke up this morning with blood all over my face and my lip was bleeding. I think i bit my lip last night… if only i could remember what i was dreaming about.

I Me Wed

I have been thinking of getting married. Not to Bob, but to me. I first thought of marring myself when I fell in love with a ring a few years back. At the time I had no male prospects so I thought that I should just marry myself and give my self the ring. I never really thought I would want to go through with it. I just thought it would be an excuse to get the ring of my heart.

A few months ago I heard this story read on NPR that rekindled my desire to marry myself.

“We think if we get a relationship, it will give us direction. Self-marriage is about creating a credo about who you are and what’s important in your life. It creates a standard to operate from.” –Ken Donaldson

Self marriage and putting our self fist isn’t a new concept.

William Shakespeare wrote, “This above all; to thine own self be true.”

Carrie from Sex and the City announced marriage to herself in “A woman’s Right to Shoes” she even registered. (season 6 episode 83)

Although not necessarily referring to the concept of self marriage, this quote by Ayn Rand in Atlas Shrugged it does promise to put yourself first.

“I swear by my life and my love of it that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.”

I remember reading the book and wanting to take the above oath, but knowing that I wasn’t ready to live by it.

Also not a quote that was referring to self marriage but I still think applies to the spirit of self marriage.

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world” -Mahatma Gandhi

I also found this article on self marriage.

“I hit upon the idea of wedding myself a few years ago — and seeing as how I’m going to be with myself for the rest of my life — I might as well make it a good one. So, the day after graduating from college, I bought myself a lovely ring and slipped it on the finger whose vein feeds to the heart. You know, I thought, here I am, and here’s the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. Of course, other applicants have been considered to come along for the ride.”

A quote form the same article on the results

“I have been filled with a sense of contentment and bliss. Obstacles don’t seem so daunting and I find myself lying in bed at night, looking forward with excited anticipation at what gifts tomorrow holds for me. Even my soon-to-be ex-husband can’t shake me from where I am now. Several of the friends from the ceremony have expressed interest in having their own wedding and I have encouraged them to do so”

I was told as a child “ you can only give what you have” This is the reason that number 76 on my list of 101 things is to buy a ring that I love. I want to get married. I want to marry myself, give myself love and companionship; after all I’m going to be with myself for a long long time. I want to give myself these things before I promise to give them to someone else. I don’t know what my self wedding will be like, and I’ve yet to write my vows but I know it will happen and have every intention to live happily ever after with me.

Toilet Bowl Confessions

At the beginning of this year i started having problems with my digestion. Poop isn’t something that we talk about a lot, especially to see if our pooping habits and patterns are normal. Turns out mine aren’t normal. Starting this year I have worked hard to change my pooping and digesting. I drink a gentle  laxative tea everyday. Keep a poop journal. Yes i know how that sounds. But since my digestion cycle is longer then most peoples I keep one to make sure that everything is in check. I have changed my diet. And I drink psylliun seed  husks and juice every morning.

This morning I didn’t get a chance to drink my husks so i decided to try eating mixed into my oatmeal. Big mistake. I have a friend who eats hers this way, so i though how bad could it be? BAD! I like my oatmeal runny. Psyllium husks add fiber into your system by absorbing liquid but staying soft, think gel like. Thus as they digest they are able to clean out your system. (side note: if you just start taking psyllium husks take 3tbs a day for a few days and you will get the most massive craziest shaped poop ever. Gross but so cool!) The absorbing property made my oatmeal the constancy of jello. But hot jello. Also the husks added a slightly grainy texture too. Almost like someone sprinkled some sand over my oatmeal.

Eating my oatmeal and husks resulted in me dry heaving for fifteen minutes over my desk at work. I had to take a longer break just  to recover. Even now typing about it makes me want to vomit. They say beauty is pain… no pooping (and the thing we do to be able to do) it is real pain.

Being Prepared

After standing in line for 45 minutes for an effing sandwich i finally understand why the man next to me is muttering and holding a 12 pack. He mush have been here before.

101 in 1001

I have decided to do participate in 101 in 1001. I will be completing 101 tasks in 1001 days. I’m choosing to start this officially on my 24th birthday. The end date will be March 13, 2011. The criteria for the tasks is that the tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

I’m still working on finalizing and organizing my list. I want the items on the list to be fun enough that I will do them. And challenging enough that I will have to put out effort and step out side my comfort zone.

It has taken me a few days to compile the list. When I first started making my list I could only come up with 30 items on my own. So, I started looking at many other lists and stealing tasks I mean getting inspiration. I was surprised at how hard it is to come up with 101 tasks. If you need help coming up with list you can look here for inspiration. Let me know if you do 101 in 1001. I would love to see other peoples lists.

Start June 15, 2008 End Sunday, March 13, 2011

Body
1. Work out 5 times a week for 1 month
2. Do at least 1 unassisted push-up
3. Go vegan for a week
4. Take my multi-vitamin everyday for 1 month
5. Get a massage.
6. Run over 5 miles at one time
7. Practice Yoga 3 times a week for 1 month
8. Get into “skinny jeans”
9. Eat raw for a day
10. Don’t eat out for a two weeks
11. Go for a walk everyday for a month
12. Get 8 hours of sleep everyday for a month
Activist
13. Participate in a large protest or a large support event
14. Participate in a charity walk/run
15. Volunteer to help in a political campaign for a person/cause I believe in.
16. Volunteer 5 or more hours
17. Donate money to a good cause
18. Buy a beggar (what is the PC term for someone begging for money?) dinner or give them $10

Write/Read
19. Blog everyday for a month
20. See an author read from his or her work
21. Make a list of 100 things that make me happy
22. Send a secret to http://postsecret.blogspot.com/
23. Write a song, and sing it to someone as proof.
24. Read 25 or more books I haven’t read yet and write reviews on each
25. Participate in and finish NaBloPoMo
26. Write an autobiography
27. Memorize something (must be over 15 lines)
28. Write a comment to everyone on my MySpace list
29. Write a letter to my former self
30. Write a letter to my future self
31. Write a letter to my future children
32. Write in my paper journal everyday for two weeks
33. Attend a poetry reading

People I love
34. Send “just because” care packages to a friends (send total of 5)
35. Send twenty snail mail cards or letters to friends and/or family
36. Send a least one birthday, anniversary, sympathy, thank you card a month
37. Host a dinner for at least four friends
38. Send out Christmas cards
39. Deliver “just because” treats to friends

Places
40. Go on a weekend trip with zero plans and go wherever the road takes us
41. Travel to three new places
42. Spend a weekend away alone
43. Visit my bother in NYC (after he moves)
44. Go camping somewhere I haven’t been
45. Visit Yosemite
46. Go on a cruise

View
47. Watch movies at the drive ins
48. Watch the sunrise and sunset in the same day
49. Visit 5 museums, galleries, exhibit, or local tourist sight (a.Powell’s Bookstore read about it here)
50. Watch a movie at the IMAX
51. Watch 100 out of the 250 movies on the IMDB list
52. Watch 10 old black and white films
53. See a play

Activities
54. Attend 3 concerts that are for me and not for Bob
55. Climb a tree
56. Go on a hike
57. Swim in the ocean
58. Visit the snow and make a snow man
59. Go to a Pro Sporting event
60. Ride in a hot air balloon
61. Walk or dance in the rain
62. Roller skate
63. Go to a Bingo Night
64. Go on a boat
65. Sing Karaoke
66. Visit 20 new local (wherever that happens to be) restaurants (a. Henry’s Tavern read about it here)
67. Call someone I have never called before and ask them to do something social
68. Go kayaking
69. Go skinny dipping

General
70. Reach a $5,000 balance in my savings account
71. Buy a new computer
72. Solve broken CD player in car issue
73. Go an entire week without swearing or cursing
74. Find correct album information and organize music on my computer
75. Don’t speak for 24 hours
76. Buy myself a ring I love (Read about it)
77. Make a time capsle
78. Give up something for Lent
79. Buy a little black dress
80. Go without internet or TV for a whole weekend
81. For one pay period only purchase gas and groceries, nothing else
82. Finish a knitting project

Education
83. Get straight A’s for a semester
84. Transfer to CSU
85. Learn to identify 2 new constellations
86. Cook 3 dishes from scratch (ones that make me step outside my cooking box. Like Indian food or something along those lines.)
87. Learn to make soap
88. Learn to crochet granny squares
89. Learn to make an awesome skirt

Art/Photos
90. Document a “day in my life” with photos
91. Take a picture every day for one year
92. Take a picture with 10 people I love and write about our relationship
93. Participate in the 100 pictures project
94. Make a scrap book/ memory journal
95. Paint a picture that I’m proud to show others
96. Read Photoshop book and learn to edit pictures
97. Draw a chalk mural on the sidewalk
98. Make 10 pairs of earrings for myself
99. Purchase a piece of art from someone local
100. Change my Myspace/Facebook photo at least once a month

The End
101. Make a new list of 101 Things by the time my 1001 days are done

(Please Note: all updates and completed items are typed in purple.)

The Baddest One Around

Sometime you do things for people that you love, like go see bands you don’t like. I fact i don’t like Les Claypool isn’t a secret. Bob also knows that i love him enough to go and see The Kernel every few months. As of this coming Saturday I will have seen Les Claypool a total of 4 times in under a year.

When i looked behind me and saw Bob dancing to wacky music I don’t get I thought three things:

One) He looks uber happy and I would do anything to see him smile that big.

Two) White boys can’t dance.

Three) I can’t wait to see Les play this coming Saturday, if only to watch Bob !

The Baddest One Around

Sometime you do things for people that you love, like go see bands you don’t like. I fact i don’t like Les Claypool isn’t a secret. Bob also knows that i love him enough to go and see The Kernel every few months. As of this coming Saturday I will have seen Les Claypool a total of 4 times in under a year.

When i looked behind me and saw Bob dancing to wacky music I don’t get I thought three things:

One) He looks uber happy and I would do anything to see him smile that big.

Two) White boys can’t dance.

Three) I can’t wait to see Les play this coming Saturday!

Bad News Comes Don’t You Worry Even When It Lands

Things to do when you think you are going think you are going to see Modest Mouse (Bob’s current favorite band) in Reno but due to technical issues with Ticket Master can’t:

Check Ticket Master often to make sure that you really can’t get tickets.

Get a fish name it Gilbert the Beta Fish. Call him Gil for short. Bob and I both love fish. Must have something to do with my last name being Salmon (Oh no! As i write this i remembered that i forgot to feed him this morning. New responsibility, keep Gil alive!) I should have made a sticky note that reminds me to feed him.

See The Visitor. It is a flawless movie. One that nothing should be changed, added, or deleted. If you see it, it may end up on your list of top movies like me.

Eat Burritos

Fall in love all over again with the man you are dating.